RHONY Season 11 Premiere Recap: Divided, They Summer

Last night’s season opener came in hot, and not just because it was sweltering in the city. Bethenny Frankel, Dorinda Medley, Luann de Lesseps, Ramona Singer, Sonja Morgan, Tinsley Mortimer and Barbara Kavovit are coming back together after a summer apart.  

The first episode of RHONY Season 11 covers many relatable topics right off the bat: death, marriage, rehab, exercise, dog poop, and a Bentley SUV.  The last one is less relatable for many but that tends to be Tinsley’s shtick.

Last night’s RHONY started out with a bang, and a cabaret.  It begins with a rehashing of Luann’s second trip to rehab and the headlines surrounding her relapse. Barbara is introduced through Luann, a longtime friend who helped get her back into rehab. Eventually, they ride off into the streets together on Luann’s Vespa.

We see Bethenny working on a photoshoot for the upcoming Skinnygirl jeans release. In one of her interviews, we learn it has only been three weeks since Dennis passed away. At one point during the shoot, she closes herself in the bathroom and her mic picks up her speaking to herself, saying “this has nothing to do with him. I don’t want to cry.” A very real moment of a working mom being overwhelmed by life, and loss.

On a less real note, watching Tinsley take delivery of Scott’s Bentley SUV felt like an episode of MTV’s My Super Sweet Sixteen. Why Tinsley needs a Bentley SUV in the city when she claims she doesn’t know how to drive is unknown.

The Queen of RHONY, Sonja, has officially left her humble abode and moved into a shiny new apartment. She mentions she has a date with Mr. Netflix-and-Chill, so we watch as she humbly tapes her monogrammed towels to the windows to provide some shade. The shade of it all!

“This looks better,” she says, staring at her white STAM-stitched towels precariously taped on the windows.  Do they provide shade? Perhaps. Do they add ambiance? Definitely. Mr. Netflix-and-chill is a lucky man.

Ramona has a swim instructor named Boris come by to give her lessons.  She spends the next 30 minutes lightly harassing him with her words, making it incredibly obvious she wouldn’t mind dating Boris the swim instructor.  “I’m very flexible” she tells him, as she floats towards him seductively on her pool noodles. Very sexy, Ramona.

There is clearly a lot of tension lingering between the RHONY cast, mostly between Dorinda and Luann.  Dorinda and Ramona are seen having the same conversation as Luann, Bethenny and Barbara, just in different locations.  Sonja and Tinsley are on their way, but haven’t made it to either gathering yet.  Which house will they choose?

Going forward, I would like to request any gifts given come in a monogrammed Lu + Tom tote.  The episode ends with a preview of what’s to come for the season, and without the cast actually being together in the same room.

Though we don’t see any reconciliation this episode, we are definitely going to see some drama when the cast of RHONY comes together in episode two, Things Are Going Southampton.  Episode two airs TONIGHT March 13 at 8 pm ET on Bravo.